ROUGH NIGHT REVIEW

Yikes! I’d rather have a rough night than watch this again.

Things go terribly wrong for a group of girlfriends who hire a male stripper for a bachelorette party in Miami.

A highly unfunny opening college flashback didn’t build my hopes up. It was good to see that ScarJo was up for a laugh BUT this was a major step down for the Avengers star.

A shame considering the talent on display; Jillian Bell (22 Jump St), Broad City’s Ilana Glazer and Saturday Night Live‘s Kate McKinnon. Funny people in their own right. BUT as much as they gave it their all; the material was dreadfully weak.

Things fared a little better when the film flash forwarded 10 years later with ScarJo’s Jess running for senate. Her ad campaign was a brilliant Hillary Clinton parody.

The reserved workaholic needing a break from her busy schedule while the rest of the gang were desperate for any excuse to escape their problems.

Popping a champagne bottle delivered a poorly timed airport gag BUT it managed to get a guilty chuckle out of me. That gag pretty much summed up the film.

“The house is everything I hate. I’m gonna take a protest dump”.

There was the occasional funny one liner and the dynamic among the girls was entertaining enough BUT the endless swearing, drug taking, shouting and penis gags got old and got old quick!

Thankfully, Kate McKinnon’s introduction into the mix spiced things up. The awkward new BFF joining the posse.

Upsetting Jillian Bell’s Alice with her very presence. Her eccentric spirit guru (and crazy Nicole Kidman-esque accent) were a much needed presence. Complete with Veggie Mite in tow.

30 minutes in, I was surprised at the dark turn that the film took after Alice’s unfortunate incident with a “stripper”. An act of desperation?

By the end . . . Yes.

It delivered the odd titter BUT the stop/start pace and mismatched tone hampered the piece.

Even the naff subplot with Jess’ effeminate fiance (Paul W. Downs) was a huge misstep. The wine tasting was silly enough BUT the “sad astronaut” gag triggered one drawn out and highly unsavoury sequence involving adult diapers, meth and strange encounters at a petrol station.

It had potential with the Mad Dogs meets The Hangover vibe as the girls’ crazy weekend spiralled out of control with mistaken identity, dodgy coppers and drugged up strippers BUT it just didn’t work.

It tried to be serious with the friends coming to terms that their lives were taking different paths as everything came to blows. It didn’t work.

You had Kate McKinnon somersaulting off a moving jet ski as it ploughed into the beach . . . Meh.

A lechy Phil Dunphy (Ty Burrell) from Modern Family and naked Demi Moore did nothing to save matters. The sex-crazed swingers next door just killed the already lumbering pace of this hit and miss yarn.

It even resorted to desperate measures with ScarJo busting out some of her Black Widow moves to knock out some burglars.

If any of what I listed above sounded alright then this might be for you.

I watched it to the end BUT that was mainly to see how much worse it was got.

I expected more or at least something passable BUT despite the odd chuckle here and there, I think this is going to be a black mark on the Black Widow’s stellar CV.

Okay, I’m done with the Black Window references.

Take it away Kevin Sorbo Hercules . . .

2/5

*NEW* FINDING DORY REVIEW *NEW*

Was it worth the wait? Should they have bothered?

The friendly but forgetful blue tang fish begins a search for her long-lost parents, and everyone learns a few things about the real meaning of family along the way.

Awww. 13 years (That’s right. 13 years?!) have passed since the first outing and surprisingly only a year has passed in the story line but either way I can happily say that it felt like they never left.

Despite being ripped by family members and work colleagues, I was happy to see that I wasn’t the only 20 something looking forward to this. BUT did it deliver? In a nutshell, yes. Anyone who says otherwise, OFF! OFF! OFF!

Of course before the movie even started, we had an adorable little animated short about Piper. The baby bird who must learn to fend for itself and overcome the trauma of the tide. Delightful. Easing us in for one of the most anticipated sequels of the year.

A heart-warming opening explored Dory’s past as we delved into her childhood and her battle with short term memory loss. The subject matter was handled delicately as Dory’s loving parents try and support her condition. I loved how it filled in the gaps and explained the origins of that annoyingly catchy “Just Keep Swimming” song.

We follow young Dory as she loses her parents and her memory of them altogether. Wandering the ocean for years, disoriented and confused. That is until she crosses paths with a raving mad clown fish desperate to find his son.

The plot line may have been a complete retread of the original with Dory getting lost, abducted and thrown into a strange aquarium but it was a journey I was still happy to take. What Andrew Stanton and the Pixar co may have lacked in story; they delivered with humour, charm and heart.

It was great to see the old faces and I did crack a little smile when Dory, Marlin and Nemo surfed with Crush and the gang. However, there were several faces that I was disappointed NOT to see make an appearance (*cough* Hellooo Bruceee *cough*).

For the hardcore Pixar fans; I couldn’t believe there wasn’t even a John Ratzenberger cameo! The man whose vocal talents had featured in almost every one. Until now.

The aquarium world may have been a little confined (Pardon the expression) BUT at least we were rewarded with new faces that stole the show; Becky the dozy bird, Bailey the bumbling Beluga Whale (Ty Burrell – Modern Family), Hank the cantankerous Octopus (voiced to perfection by Ed O’Neill – Married with Children/Modern Family) and, my personal favourites, the sloth-like seals Fluke and Rudder (voiced by none other than The Wire’s Idris Elba and Dominic West).

Every new supporting character helped bring some much needed fun and energy to a highly predictable story line from Fluke and Rudder’s rock rivalry with simple Gerald to a depressed sea clam in need of some company. Burrell was hysterical as Bailey. His attempt at echolocation had me in stitches.

Marlin and Nemo were pushed into the background a lot more than I’d hoped or expected. I knew this was always going to be Dory’s story BUT Brooks’ mad ramblings and whimpering were missed.

However, DeGeneres was on fine form yet again as our leading lady. From the random stories to her hysterical whale babble. You really felt for Dory as she battled the memories and flashbacks. Desperate to reunite with her family once and for all.

The flashbacks were insightful (To begin with) but they soon overstayed their welcome and got a little repetitive. Reiterating the same old points by the closing act.

I liked the dynamic between Hank and Dory. They were a great duo. Hank’s resilience to resist Dory’s charm, as he focused on his mission to avoid returning to the ‘filthy ocean life’, was the perfect tonic.

A couple of the whale talking skits may have gone on a bit but it didn’t spoil the fun. The touch pool sequence was like something out of a horror film with all the little sea creatures hiding and clinging on for dear life. An unexpected cameo and an underwater pipe sonar sequence delivered a brilliant Alien homage.

The chase sequences (especially a high speed truck chase) may have took the biscuit BUT it was far too silly and fun for me to gripe about too much. There were also some genuinely touching moments. BUT yet it didn’t quite pluck the heart strings or grab me as much as the original did.

It was always going to be a tall order. Especially after Pixar outdone themselves with Toy Story 3 (I’m ignoring Planes and Cars on the sequel debate). BUT it was still good fun and easygoing with a mad bunch of characters. A nice post credits sequence subdued some of the little niggles that were bugging me.

Pixar delivered a wonderful message about coping with mental disabilities and still managed to work their magic to make this miserable movie moaner look like this for a couple of hours . . .

3.5/5

*THROWBACK REVIEW* MR PEABODY AND SHERMAN

Nothing to bark home about. (What? If you’re tutting at that, then this film is not for you. If you tutted but had a cheeky little grin, then this might be). Enough hi-jinks and 3D animation to keep the children wagging their tails but it’s hardly a rollicking family movie.

It’s not all bad and to be honest, it jumps straight into the action with Mr. Peabody (voiced brilliantly by Ty Burrell or Phil Dunphy from Modern Family BUT less annoying) making a brief introduction about his numerous achievements from birth, after being neglected for being unique (the usual spiel). His greatest challenge, however, was adopting seven year old Sherman.

We join the dynamic duo on a time travelling escapade, basking it up in the 18th Century French Revolution before its inevitable uprising. It zips along, the 3D is actually quite good with the swords and spears pointing out of the screen. The one liners are guilty pleasures, silly but funny pun gags.

One particular guilty chuckle was during a zany escape attempt from the guillotine that is as bonkers as the Sherlock fall. Mr Peabody delivers the punch line, “The best thing to do is be calm and keep your head”.

However, this is all thrown aside as Sherman attends his first day of school. And before you know it, he’s in a fight with a bully. Twist, the bully is a girl named Penny (voiced by Ariel Winters or interestingly Alex Dunphy from Modern Family). This leads to the gruesome child protection services officer Mrs Grunion (Mom’s Allison Janney), who bears some deep resentment towards dogs owning children. She threatens to take Sherman away.

In attempt to prevent the pair being torn apart (Aww. Yuck) Peabody invites Penny and her parents over for dinner. Penny and Sherman inevitably refuse to get along. That is until, against Peabody’s wishes, Sherman introduces her to the Way Back (time machine).

The pod looks exactly like the one from Free Birds. This film may not be great but it’s better than that turkey (What?). However, the jokes are few and far between. And the overall story is the same old guff. The time travel sequences end up visiting all the obvious famous figures, Shakespeare (check), Van Gogh (check), Da Vinci (check) – cue a highly predictable gag about the real reason behind Mona Lisa’s smile.

It seems like the movie ran out of gas by the hour mark and threw the lazy plot device of the time machine’s power being drained so they have to stop at random points of time. In all fairness, the 14th Century Florence skit with Stanley Tucci’s Da Vinci wasn’t too bad and his creepy child machine was very weird but funny. The ruse that Mona Lisa was all for tourist promotion wasn’t bad.

However, there is the usual cheesy father/son/dog/pup spats and brewing, if unnecessary, romance between Penny and Sherman. OTT slapstick and silly gags. However, after the hour, the film does find another gear and revs up to a mad timey wimey finale. The Troy sequence was hilarious with the testerone-pumped dimwits led by Agamemnon, voiced expertly by Patrick Warburton (Joe from Family Guy). The comparisons between their weird family upbringings was a surprise and one for the adults. “Don’t get me started on Oedipus. You do not want to go round there at Thanksgiving”.

The timey wimey stuff made it more interesting once they start breaking up the space time continuum and the past goes back to the present but it all got ridiculous with the inevitable cheesy, corny happy ending. Watchable, brilliant visuals, if predictable guff. Shame considering the talent; I mean come on, Mel Brooks, Dennis Haysbert, Stephen Colbert, Leslie Mann! Enough for the little ones but the bigger kids will be fidgeting . . . towards the exit door.

2.5/5 for me

MUPPETS MOST WANTED REVIEW

Meh-na-meh-na- Muppets Most Wanted? Unfortunately this time round, Muppets Missed Something.

Before you ask, I am a big Muppet (We know that. Stop it. We’re better than that) fan. I’ve loved the TV series and the movie franchise. After the fantastic reboot, it was inevitable a sequel would be in motion. This is hilariously demonstrated in the film’s opening toe tapping musical number, “We’re Making a Sequel”. The list of unexpected cameos who pop their heads up in this film is ridiculous and unexpected, despite some being pointed out in the trailers to help flog the film. I won’t name them all because firstly it would be a long list and if not for the cameos, there wasn’t much to look forward to this time around. Don’t get me wrong, the Muppets are still funny and have their moments but the material seems to stretch on for too long and we’ve seen it done before a lot funnier before by the gang in their earlier efforts.

A silly premise of Kermit being imprisoned and replaced by his criminal Russian doppelganger, the number one criminal in all the world, Constantine with a distinguishing feature makes for a funny gag that unfortunately drags on for too long. This cues a lazy excuse for a tour around the world with slapstick and shenanigans. It was great to bring Kermit back as the leading . . . frog after the last film was about Walter. Unfortunately, Walter doesn’t really appear or make an impression until the hour mark. However, when dealing with such an array of characters, it’s hard not to isolate certain characters. An unexpected inside joke pokes fun at this. It’s not all bad. Kermit’s incarceration in the gulag allowed for a funny prison musical number with Jermaine Clement (we’ve had one half of the Conchords, why not have the other?), Ray Liotta (All my life I was always wanted to be in the Muppets. He doesn’t say that. But I wish he did), and Danny Trejo as . . . Danny Trejo. Tina Fey as the ice cold gulag warden brings the odd chuckle and her singing isn’t too bad, despite an exaggerated Russian accent.

Now as you know a certain Mr Ricky Gervais (who has not stopped tweeting about this project) plays a pivotal role as the suspiciously notorious tour manager Dominic Badguy (Bad-guy? It’s French for nice man. Nothing? Well). Gervais’ comic delivery is surprisingly stale. Never was an actor. Let’s be honest. However, his expired ‘look to the camera’ face pulling spiel actually works and his song and dance number with Kermit was a surprise. He gives it a go and pokes fun at himself, inevitably Brenting it up. If you’re a fan of Gervais, then he’s does alright. Otherwise, his smarmy presence works for the role but just doesn’t quite click or come off as funny as you’d expect. This film seems to miss that energy and chemistry that Amy Adams and Jason Segel brought to the table. I mean even Chris Cooper rapped and still pulled off the evil role.

The gags on the language barriers weren’t too bad, most notably in Berlin (Die Muppets? They hate us already). Fozzy Bear, Animal and Walter provide some of the more memorable moments. However, there’s one diva you can’t miss and that is Miss Piggy. It’s hard not for her to stand out (it’s like she’s real or something). A surprise duet with another “diva” made for a typical Muppet parody. The Muppets still bring the laughs but it seems that the human counterparts let this show down for me. I mean for the movie buffs, the Swedish Chef does a passing Ingmar Bergman reference. Straight over the little ‘uns heads but brilliantly done. The songs don’t seem to be as memorable as before, apart from the opener, they don’t stand out like the Oscar winning “Man or Muppet”. The cameos, despite being unexpected, are hardly fantastic or funny for that matter. Brings the odd smile but once you see them, they don’t do much else or stand out, bar Christophe Walz doing the Waltz. Worth it for the punditry alone. Ty Burrell (Mr Peabody and Sherman/Modern Family) is a notable exception. His Clousseau-esque detective is not bad and his rivalry with the Eagle makes for a cheeky poke at US/French relations with a compensating big badge off. A guilty gag that gets a giggle. It has enough for the little kids but for the bigger ones, to quote the opening song, “The sequel is just not as good”.

Harsh but if not for the cameos, this could have been one of their TV movie counterparts. It’s tough but you can’t help but compare to their more successful sequels, A Muppet’s Christmas Carol, Muppet Treasure Island and the Muppets 2011 movie, and feel it missed the mark. Watchable, the odd giggle. Not bad but back to the drawing board, maybe guys? 2.5/5

Currently ranks #101 out of 156!

*Please note before the film there is a good little Monsters University short called Party Central.