*NEW* THE MUMMY REVIEW *NEW*

Oh Mumma, the horror, the horror! Bring back Brendan Fraser! An ancient Egyptian princess (Sofia Boutella) is awakened from her crypt beneath the desert, bringing with her malevolence grown over millennia, and terrors that defy human comprehension. Okay, it wasn’t that bad BUT it wasn’t that great either. To be honest, the opening act didn’t … Continue reading *NEW* THE MUMMY REVIEW *NEW*

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*NEW* DEATH NOTE (2017) REVIEW *NEW*

Bit of a bum note, more like. Hardly worthy of death threats BUT yikes . . . It's a bit of a mess. High school student, Light Turner (Nat Wolff) discovers a mysterious notebook that has the power to kill anyone whose name is written within its pages and launches a secret crusade to rid … Continue reading *NEW* DEATH NOTE (2017) REVIEW *NEW*

*NEW* VALERIAN AND THE CITY OF A THOUSAND PLANETS REVIEW *NEW*

Dull-Erian. Trust me, that pun was as clever and witty as the dialogue and plot. Sheesh. What has happened to Luc Besson? The man who gave us The Fifth Element, Leon: The Professional, Taken, The Transporter. Okay, yes. He also made Taken 2, Taken 3, Lucy, Transporter 2, Transporter 3 - you get the idea. … Continue reading *NEW* VALERIAN AND THE CITY OF A THOUSAND PLANETS REVIEW *NEW*

STAR TREK BEYOND 3D REVIEW

Star Trek be-yawwwnnneed. The USS Enterprise crew explores the furthest reaches of uncharted space, where they encounter a new ruthless enemy (Ol' Luther - I mean, Idris Elba) who puts them and everything the Federation stands for to the test. I’m NOT the biggest Trekkie BUT I have really enjoyed the Abram reboots. Shaking up … Continue reading STAR TREK BEYOND 3D REVIEW

*NEW* xXx: RETURN OF XANDER CAGE REVIEW *NEW*

He should have stayed dead. Left for dead, Xander Cage (Vin Diesel) secretly returns to action for a new, tough assignment with his handler Augustus Gibbons (Samuel L Jackson). Let's be honest. You should know what to expect with Vin Diesel. I actually enjoyed the first xXx. It had the right balance of action, fun … Continue reading *NEW* xXx: RETURN OF XANDER CAGE REVIEW *NEW*

*NEW* KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD REVIEW *NEW*

I don't know what was worse; David Beckham's cameo or the movie altogether. Thy verdict is in and its all apples and pears, san. Robbed of his birthright, Arthur (Charlie Hunnam) comes up the hard way in the back alleys of the city. But once he pulls the sword from the stone, he is forced … Continue reading *NEW* KING ARTHUR: LEGEND OF THE SWORD REVIEW *NEW*

*NEW* ALIEN: COVENANT REVIEW *NEW*

Even in space, no one should see this dreadful Alien prequel. The crew of a colony ship, bound for a remote planet, discover an uncharted paradise with a threat beyond their imagination, and must attempt a harrowing escape. Sound familiar? It should. For the love of God, Ridley Scott. Just stop. I can respect the … Continue reading *NEW* ALIEN: COVENANT REVIEW *NEW*